Secret monarchy moves to abandon crown

In one final act of republican rebellion against its true and legitimate identity as a loyal dominion of the Crown, the Kingdom of Ireland finally plans to abandon the Queen.

Despite gaining independence from London in 1922, and allegedly ditching the monarchy in 1937 (when Eamon de Valera ditched the constitution agreed by Michael Collins and replaced the office of Governor-General of the Irish Free State with a president) it appears that Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II (or, indeed, Francis II of Bavaria… but we won’t go into that) remains the rightful and legal monarch of Ireland to this day.

In 1542, King Henry VIII tried to put the Irish question beyond doubt by having the Irish parliament pass a law declaring him to be the King of Ireland. This law was rather unkindly and disloyally repealed by the Irish in 1962, but a recent review of laws on the Irish statute book pre-dating independence has revealed the heart-warming truth that there was, in fact, a second law also passed in 1542 which had gone unnoticed for centuries but which restated and expanded on the first declaring King Henry to be the King of Ireland.

The news that our brethren in Ireland are still legally subjects of the Crown will no doubt delight the loyal monarchist members of the RCC. One can only hope that the Irish people will see sense and embrace their royal identity once again.

Unfortunately, however, our man in the capital of Her Majesty’s realm of Ireland reports that the chances of the newly discovered law escaping the chop in a much-heralded pruning of pre-independence legislation appear slight. It seems that the Irish are planning to ditch the crown yet again, unless a trawl through the statute books can unearth another similar law. If any reader does discover such a law, keep it under your hat!

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5 thoughts on “Secret monarchy moves to abandon crown

  1. It would be nice if the Irish Republic’s Government would petition the British Government to repeal Section 2(1) of the Ireland Act 1949 which says:

    “2 Republic of Ireland not a foreign country

    (1) It is hereby declared that, notwithstanding that the Republic of Ireland is not part of His Majesty’s dominions, the Republic of Ireland is not a foreign country for the purposes of any law in force in any part of the United Kingdom or in any colony, protectorate or United Kingdom trust territory, whether by virtue of a rule of law or of an Act of Parliament or any other enactment or instrument whatsoever, whether passed or made before or after the passing of this Act, and references in any Act of Parliament, other enactment or instrument whatsoever, whether passed or made before or after the passing of this Act, to foreigners, aliens, foreign countries, and foreign or foreign-built ships or aircraft shall be construed accordingly. ”

    This must be deeply repugnant to an independent country.

    Incidentally, are the two 1542 laws still part of UK law?

  2. Perhaps Sir Les Patterson could be drafted in as the temporary Viceroy, at least until the situation is sorted out.

    As Barry Humphries said in the foreword to “The Complete Barry McKenizie”, (published by Methuen in 1988) “The guileless bonhommie of Australians abroad and their habits of gross intemperance led many people to think of them as culturally kin to London’s displaced Irish population – as indeed they were”.

    That being the case, Sir Les would be an inspired choice……

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